Being parents has always been difficult in all circumstances. And if you are a single mother, things can get even harder. There’s added pressure, responsibilities, and emotional drain.
Being a single mother, you will have to find a proper balance between your job and personal life. Apart from employment, you are now responsible for the important job of solo parenting.
There are times when you will feel stress and fatigue from this huge duty but this could be rewarding too. All you need is a routine and proper management of your time to ace this.
To help you in the same, in this article I have suggested certain pointers to aid you to become a successful single mother.
- Support network:
When you start single parenting as a single mother, you’d often feel exhausted and stressed. Rather than feeling overwhelmed and isolated, you can rely on a support group. This network will give you solace in the fact that you are not the only one facing issues of being a single mother. Not only that, interacting with adults after spending so much time with your child could be refreshing as well. Arranging play dates with families having children of the same age as your children can teach children how to be sociable and also give you a much-needed break.
- Male role models:
Raising a child as a single mother could mean that your child doesn’t have a clear idea about men. Whether it’s a girl or a boy, your child needs good male role models in their life. It is critical that they have positive role models who can provide them with an accurate picture of “decent” males. It may be a member of your family or one of your close friends. Trustworthy male role models should be willing to spend time with your children. This contributes significantly to a child’s optimal emotional development.
Children thrive when they have a set routine. The structure allows them to anticipate what will happen subsequently. You have to juggle work, home, and children as a single mother. Putting in place a routine could get difficult for you as it takes patience and quite a lot of energy on your part as well. It is advisable that you follow the set routine strictly and get your children habituated to it as well. It is seen that children who stick to a schedule are brought up to be successful.
As a single parent, it is completely your responsibility to instill discipline in your children. Otherwise, it may lead to the rise of behavioral issues in your children. Children getting into mischief is a natural part of growing up. At the same time, it’s vital to remember that kids need to know what they may expect in terms of repercussions. Don’t make hollow threats, keep your cool, and don’t be a pushover. Discipline should promote learning rather than separating you and your kid.
- Adjust priorities:
Many single mothers fall into the superwoman trap, believing that in addition to working all day, they need to have a tidy house, prepare home-cooked meals, and look after their children. You shouldn’t feel obligated to overcompensate simply because you’re raising your children alone. You must be realistic about what they can and cannot do in a day. You can take a break once in a while. Learn to delegate the work and readjust your priorities. A happy mom equates to a happy child.
- Child care:
Balancing between career and child care could give rise to stress, exhaustion, and fatigue. You may have to rely on external child care services. You can invest in a good daycare center with good reviews from other parents for the time you will be working. If you require more frequent child care like daily, then look for a trained caregiver who can provide stimulation in a safe atmosphere. Do not rely only on an older kid to look after your children. Asking a new acquaintance or partner to watch your child should be done with caution.
- Seek help:
Sometimes it is hard for a single mom to admit that she needs help. There is nothing to be ashamed of while seeking help when you need it for better child care. Together with other parents, you can arrange a carpool timetable. You can also join a single-parent support group or seek out social resources. You can ask for help from your families or friends. You can even trade this service with other parents. Faith communities can also be beneficial. This would take some load off of you and help you relax.
- Importance of money:
It is your responsibility as a single mother to teach your child about money management. Children should understand that financial freedom is earned via a lot of effort. The children should understand that money earned cannot be squandered carelessly, and that the salary that supports the family should be treasured. Even simple ideas like budgeting and saving may help your children build healthy financial habits that will serve them for the rest of their lives. Raising a child who appreciates the worth of money is essential.
- Don’t feel guilty:
It’s critical that you don’t hold yourself responsible for the past (if any) or indulge your child to compensate for being a single parent. It’s difficult to stay cheerful when you’re reminded of your previous life, but you and your child will prosper if you do. Working mothers feel bad for not spending enough time with their children, while single mothers feel guilty for raising children without a father in their lives. It’s past time for you to let go of your guilt. You’re trying your best in the circumstances you’re in, and children notice.
It is important that you give your health priority too. You shouldn’t forget yourself amidst work and child care. You should know that good physical, mental, and emotional health are critical to your success as a parent. Try to squeeze in a personal time within your busy schedule. You can catch up on the show that you haven’t seen in weeks, or complete the book that you once started but couldn’t finish. You need to refresh yourself to be able to take better care of yourself and your child.